Because He Loved Me First

Peru.

I volunteered. 

I wasn’t threatened, or forced against my will. I didn’t buckle under pressure from God. I chose this.

Going to be a missionary overseas is NOT something I never wanted and felt forced to do out of guilt or duty.

Cusco, Peru

Sure, it’s a command. But it’s also a delight. We delight in the law of the Lord.

I volunteered.

Sometimes I think I’m a glutton for punishment. The hard things spur me on in faith. But being a missionary overseas, while yes, hard, and not at all romantic, it’s also very rewarding. Not always rewarding now, or even in this life, but it is rewarding.

January is approaching quickly, the month I go. The month I leave home, cram all my doctors appointments in, figure out what the heck to do with my furniture and belongings, shove some stuff in a bag, say, “see ya later,” and board a plane to a country I’ve never been and to a people whose language I don’t speak.

I volunteered.

I figure doing what God says, sharing the gospel, loving the widowed and orphaned, making disciples… If God commanded it, and He’s for my good, why would I not go?

You see… I’m excited because I trust God. And while there are many things I could fear, or freak out about (which I do more often than I’d like to admit) , I know that in obedience there is freedom and an abundance of joy.

I volunteered.

Why? I could come up with a whole lot of reasons why I decided to go to Peru. Some about my spiritual gifts, my desires and passions, but I decided to go, really, for one reason:

Jesus loved me first.

In my sin and rebellion he died on a cross, enduring the wrath of God although He lived a sinless life. After the sacrifice was made, he rose from the dead three days later, claiming victory over death, Satan, and sin. He crushed the head of the enemy, so that I might know victory over sin and live eternally in heaven with Him. He drew me out of the pits. I was dead and he brought my dead bones to life because why? He loved me. And still loves me. Jesus delights in me. And He created this world in perfection, and now tainted by sin, He has promised to restore it back to His original design. Why wouldn’t I want to be a part of this?

He loved me first. So I volunteered. My satisfaction is not found in earthly comfort but in Jesus and the eternal hope He has offered. Freely given.

It’s not a debt I owe.

It’s a desire I own.

As Karen Watson (a missionary to Iraq who died in 2004) has said, and it resonates closely with my heart and soul:

“When God calls there are no regrets. I tried to share my heart with you as much as possible, my heart for the nations. I wasn't called to a place; I was called to Him. To obey was my objective, to suffer was expected, His glory my reward, His glory my reward . . .

The missionary heart:

    Cares more than some think is wise

    Risks more that some think is safe

    Dreams more than some think is practical

    Expects more than some think is possible.

I was called not to comfort or to success but to obedience. . . .”

This lady is my new favorite... ^^^

After all this: A short update on support raising. I currently have 73% of my support raised and am praying I can be done by December 1. That’s a big and bold prayer, especially in the midst of working full time, but God is a big God right?

Please, join me in praying for 100% support as well as more faithful friends who may be interested in joining my support team for the sake of the best news I could ever share, the gospel. If you are interested, or someone you know may interested in learning more about the ministry I will be doing in Peru, it would be my JOY to tell you about it. Thankful for you people. :)