Tattoo
J1211214
I got a tattoo this past summer. ^ that tattoo actually.
Satan murdered Job’s children. Satan told God that Job would turn from God and curse Him. Job didn’t. He tore his clothes and shaved his head in grief and he bowed down to worship the Lord. Oh the faith of Job. I want faith like Job. God allowed his children to be murdered yet Job worshipped God. Job knew he wasn’t entitled to an easy life on earth.
I find myself thinking I’m entitled. In my pride I cry to the Lord and say, “I’ve served you with the most faith I know how and yet you don’t give me this.” Or, “I’ve been faithful to the best of my ability, do I not get to see one lost friend come to know you?”
Oh my heart aches for the pride of these statements. Who am I that I should deserve anything from The Lord? Isn’t that the first half of the gospel? That I deserved Hell and nothing better? Who am I to even question and better yet not fall to my knees to worship The Lord for what He is doing and even for what he isn’t doing? Isn't that part of the second half of the gospel? That because God loved me, He sent Christ to live the life I could not and die the death I deserved. That I might be blameless before my Father and have the privilege of bowing before His throne so that He would receive glory.
If he’s not doing it, it’s best.
If He is, it’s best. After all, he is GOD.
That’s what Job did. He worshipped God after the DEATH of his children. It’s the very first thing he did. He worshipped the Creator, Provider, Holy, Sovereign, Just, and Gracious God. Job believed these things about God. And so do I.
Can I be honest? I’ve been prayerfully preparing for this thing called “after graduation”. Seniors, you know… it’s likely to be the most common question you get asked at the Thanksgiving table next week. So, what’s next? Welp… I have no clue. *cue panic attack and gasps from your successful cousins because graduation is in less than a month and you have no plan* also… *cue big Jules coming to my defense as she always does when my “plans” seem stupid to everyone else* (love that woman)
No. I will worship.
I want to think I deserve reward for my hard work. I want to think I deserve something in return for my faithfulness (and often lack thereof) as graduation approaches. That this beautiful job will make itself appear or the best overseas opportunity will present itself and unfold so nicely. I am guaranteed nothing but grace for tomorrow and eternity with Christ. Reality is, he gave me the faith to persevere and the grace to graduate.
Is that enough? In my head, I say yes. But do I live like Christ is enough? Or do I live like Christ AND the things I think I deserve are enough?
Job wasn’t perfect. Obviously, or his name would be Jesus. What God did was broaden Job’s view of Himself. He made Job see the greatness of God, not necessarily the purposes behind what He was or wasn’t doing. He made Job see how big and mighty and powerful God was.
I pray as I enter a season of unknowns that what I would know is God. I would know His greatness. I would know his hunger for justice and his compassionate grace. I pray I would know more of God so that my view of myself and my life, that vanishes like a mist, would decrease. I pray my concern would be Christ. Not even how I can serve Christ, but Christ himself. I want to be humbled by His greatness and spurred on to love Him deeply.
I pray I would not think I’m entitled to certain blessings but that I would see I’ve already received the greatest blessing. Christ. I already have what I want most. May my desire for Him grow me. May He guide me into the unknown, and may I not fear knowing I already have the greatest gift. And lastly, may this spur me on to weep over those who don’t have this blessing, who don’t have Christ, who do not see the greatness of God and who do not worship Him.
So, that tattoo. J1211214
Job 1:21 2012 and 2014. –When Job worshipped God for the death of His children. And the years of the deaths of two of the most precious lives I got the privilege of being a part of.
I see the greatness of God for what He gives and what He takes away. Blessed be His name. I don't claim to understand and don't curse God for not giving a reason. I worship Him for what he's done. Zuena, alive or dead. Sam, alive or dead. I WILL WORSHIP.
“And he said, ‘Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.’” Job 1:21
(side note: I just realized my dad used to say when I was younger the only tattoo I was allowed to get was a Clemson paw... This is justified though right dad?) LOL
I got a tattoo this past summer. ^ that tattoo actually.
Satan murdered Job’s children. Satan told God that Job would turn from God and curse Him. Job didn’t. He tore his clothes and shaved his head in grief and he bowed down to worship the Lord. Oh the faith of Job. I want faith like Job. God allowed his children to be murdered yet Job worshipped God. Job knew he wasn’t entitled to an easy life on earth.
I find myself thinking I’m entitled. In my pride I cry to the Lord and say, “I’ve served you with the most faith I know how and yet you don’t give me this.” Or, “I’ve been faithful to the best of my ability, do I not get to see one lost friend come to know you?”
Oh my heart aches for the pride of these statements. Who am I that I should deserve anything from The Lord? Isn’t that the first half of the gospel? That I deserved Hell and nothing better? Who am I to even question and better yet not fall to my knees to worship The Lord for what He is doing and even for what he isn’t doing? Isn't that part of the second half of the gospel? That because God loved me, He sent Christ to live the life I could not and die the death I deserved. That I might be blameless before my Father and have the privilege of bowing before His throne so that He would receive glory.
If he’s not doing it, it’s best.
If He is, it’s best. After all, he is GOD.
That’s what Job did. He worshipped God after the DEATH of his children. It’s the very first thing he did. He worshipped the Creator, Provider, Holy, Sovereign, Just, and Gracious God. Job believed these things about God. And so do I.
Can I be honest? I’ve been prayerfully preparing for this thing called “after graduation”. Seniors, you know… it’s likely to be the most common question you get asked at the Thanksgiving table next week. So, what’s next? Welp… I have no clue. *cue panic attack and gasps from your successful cousins because graduation is in less than a month and you have no plan* also… *cue big Jules coming to my defense as she always does when my “plans” seem stupid to everyone else* (love that woman)
No. I will worship.
I want to think I deserve reward for my hard work. I want to think I deserve something in return for my faithfulness (and often lack thereof) as graduation approaches. That this beautiful job will make itself appear or the best overseas opportunity will present itself and unfold so nicely. I am guaranteed nothing but grace for tomorrow and eternity with Christ. Reality is, he gave me the faith to persevere and the grace to graduate.
Is that enough? In my head, I say yes. But do I live like Christ is enough? Or do I live like Christ AND the things I think I deserve are enough?
Job wasn’t perfect. Obviously, or his name would be Jesus. What God did was broaden Job’s view of Himself. He made Job see the greatness of God, not necessarily the purposes behind what He was or wasn’t doing. He made Job see how big and mighty and powerful God was.
I pray as I enter a season of unknowns that what I would know is God. I would know His greatness. I would know his hunger for justice and his compassionate grace. I pray I would know more of God so that my view of myself and my life, that vanishes like a mist, would decrease. I pray my concern would be Christ. Not even how I can serve Christ, but Christ himself. I want to be humbled by His greatness and spurred on to love Him deeply.
I pray I would not think I’m entitled to certain blessings but that I would see I’ve already received the greatest blessing. Christ. I already have what I want most. May my desire for Him grow me. May He guide me into the unknown, and may I not fear knowing I already have the greatest gift. And lastly, may this spur me on to weep over those who don’t have this blessing, who don’t have Christ, who do not see the greatness of God and who do not worship Him.
So, that tattoo. J1211214
Job 1:21 2012 and 2014. –When Job worshipped God for the death of His children. And the years of the deaths of two of the most precious lives I got the privilege of being a part of.
I see the greatness of God for what He gives and what He takes away. Blessed be His name. I don't claim to understand and don't curse God for not giving a reason. I worship Him for what he's done. Zuena, alive or dead. Sam, alive or dead. I WILL WORSHIP.
“And he said, ‘Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The LORD gave, and the LORD has taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD.’” Job 1:21
(side note: I just realized my dad used to say when I was younger the only tattoo I was allowed to get was a Clemson paw... This is justified though right dad?) LOL
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