Hold up. Stop.
Make flash cards pertaining to muscles and action potentials
Coffee with a friend
Study for Lab Exam
Write English informative paper
Prepare for Bible study
Do math homework
Campus Outreach leadership
Study flash cards pertaining to muscles and action potentials
Try on and order new scrubs
Sign up for the TEAS exam
Email new advisor to set up advising meeting
Schedule required health assessment in Pineville
Schedule a doctors appointment
Register for race
Train for race
Keep studying
Help with youth worship team at church
Campus Outreach Prayer night
Clean
Write Anna
Send thank you card
"WOAH.
Hold up.
Stop.
This is way too much to handle."
A year ago today I was probably slightly homesick in the small village of Kamaka in Jinja, Uganda. I was more than likely cleaning up some sort of bodily fluid mess and helping cook the normal potatoes and lentils. It felt like 100 degrees and I probably hadn't showered in days. The power was possibly out. I was probably snuggling baby M, hording him for myself. I might have hollered "nada!!!" several times to the older boys who were doing something they weren't supposed to. I'm one hundred percent positive my feet were clay stained and shoes were the last thing on my mind. I was oblivious to the fact that in only a month and few days my trust and faith would be tested like never before.
And look at me now. A year later.
Had you asked me a year ago where I would be in a year... I probably wouldn't have replied with anything close to the correct answer. Nursing school in Charlotte? Ministering to college freshman. What? No way! That isn't what I'm "supposed" to do, I would have said.
God has such a sense of humor.
I hit a wall about a week ago. What in the world are you doing with me God? I feel so ill-equipped to be in nursing school. Some days I wake up and think it's a dream because there is no way it's true. I feel too sinful and unworthy to lead girls in a bible study. The "to-do" lists never end. The enemy really toyed with me for a few days. I wrestled with this idea that I wasn't able to be used, that I was just wasting my time. Then on a Sunday night, the Lord brought me to my knees in tears, as He always does at just the right time. He laid before me something so simple, something He has taught me so many times that I let my fleshly desires and weakness take over... are you ready?... patience. I must wait for the Lord.
Isaiah 40:31 says, "Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary."
Right there, on my knees, this is what the Lord revealed to me. If I, "...wait for the Lord..."
If I am patient, if I trust His timing instead of mine, if I remain faithful, if I seek Him with every fiber of my being, if I throw up my hands and let Him lead it all, I will,"...gain new strength..."
Wait hold your horses God, is this not what you taught me at this time last year? With every second in Uganda that I was waiting on you, you built my strength. I didn't see it then, but you know what they say, hind sight is 20/20. I gained SO much strength in the Lord by waiting on Him, by trusting Him when everything seemed wrong with the world and so twisted.
This is what I must do now. I must wait on the Lord. I must wait to see the blessings of getting a nursing degree. I must wait to see how He moves in the lives of these freshman girls. I must wait to meet the man who will be my ministry partner for the rest of life. And while I wait, I will rest, be joyful, work diligently, seek him, be intentional, pray constantly, repent always, seek guidance, and He will give me new strength, HIS strength while I wait.
Praise Him for this.
Praise Him for lessons that must be re-learned, no matter how many times.
And Praise Him for His everlasting Word that has the same power from one situation to the next; from when it was written, to Uganda Africa 2012, to Charlotte NC 2013, and so many in between.
My biggest prayer now is that with this new strength to be gained, it will only turn back to glorify Christ in every single way.
Coffee with a friend
Study for Lab Exam
Write English informative paper
Prepare for Bible study
Do math homework
Campus Outreach leadership
Study flash cards pertaining to muscles and action potentials
Try on and order new scrubs
Sign up for the TEAS exam
Email new advisor to set up advising meeting
Schedule required health assessment in Pineville
Schedule a doctors appointment
Register for race
Train for race
Keep studying
Help with youth worship team at church
Campus Outreach Prayer night
Clean
Write Anna
Send thank you card
"WOAH.
Hold up.
Stop.
This is way too much to handle."
A year ago today I was probably slightly homesick in the small village of Kamaka in Jinja, Uganda. I was more than likely cleaning up some sort of bodily fluid mess and helping cook the normal potatoes and lentils. It felt like 100 degrees and I probably hadn't showered in days. The power was possibly out. I was probably snuggling baby M, hording him for myself. I might have hollered "nada!!!" several times to the older boys who were doing something they weren't supposed to. I'm one hundred percent positive my feet were clay stained and shoes were the last thing on my mind. I was oblivious to the fact that in only a month and few days my trust and faith would be tested like never before.
And look at me now. A year later.
Had you asked me a year ago where I would be in a year... I probably wouldn't have replied with anything close to the correct answer. Nursing school in Charlotte? Ministering to college freshman. What? No way! That isn't what I'm "supposed" to do, I would have said.
God has such a sense of humor.
I hit a wall about a week ago. What in the world are you doing with me God? I feel so ill-equipped to be in nursing school. Some days I wake up and think it's a dream because there is no way it's true. I feel too sinful and unworthy to lead girls in a bible study. The "to-do" lists never end. The enemy really toyed with me for a few days. I wrestled with this idea that I wasn't able to be used, that I was just wasting my time. Then on a Sunday night, the Lord brought me to my knees in tears, as He always does at just the right time. He laid before me something so simple, something He has taught me so many times that I let my fleshly desires and weakness take over... are you ready?... patience. I must wait for the Lord.
Isaiah 40:31 says, "Yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary."
Right there, on my knees, this is what the Lord revealed to me. If I, "...wait for the Lord..."
If I am patient, if I trust His timing instead of mine, if I remain faithful, if I seek Him with every fiber of my being, if I throw up my hands and let Him lead it all, I will,"...gain new strength..."
Wait hold your horses God, is this not what you taught me at this time last year? With every second in Uganda that I was waiting on you, you built my strength. I didn't see it then, but you know what they say, hind sight is 20/20. I gained SO much strength in the Lord by waiting on Him, by trusting Him when everything seemed wrong with the world and so twisted.
This is what I must do now. I must wait on the Lord. I must wait to see the blessings of getting a nursing degree. I must wait to see how He moves in the lives of these freshman girls. I must wait to meet the man who will be my ministry partner for the rest of life. And while I wait, I will rest, be joyful, work diligently, seek him, be intentional, pray constantly, repent always, seek guidance, and He will give me new strength, HIS strength while I wait.
Praise Him for this.
Praise Him for lessons that must be re-learned, no matter how many times.
And Praise Him for His everlasting Word that has the same power from one situation to the next; from when it was written, to Uganda Africa 2012, to Charlotte NC 2013, and so many in between.
My biggest prayer now is that with this new strength to be gained, it will only turn back to glorify Christ in every single way.
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